I am confused!

When we enter into confusion we feel anxious, helpless and desperate. Of course there are milder levels of confusion also but what we are dealing with here is the case of confusion where there is unease and anxiety.

So What Causes Confusion?

  1. A lack of clarity about our goals or direction
  2. Misunderstanding a certain concept
  3. Indecision about the right action to take

The above three can easily be the main reasons for any type of confusion to arise within us.

Of course, only a very small percentage of humans live a life free of confusion. These humans don’t live by their mind but from a deeper place of wisdom and intelligence, let’s just call it “stillness” or “silent presence”. If you, like most humans, live your life dictated by mind activity then you are bound to feel confused very often.

Why is the Mind Always Confused?

The mind or “the ego” (as called in the spiritual circles) is nothing but a bundle of conditioning. It usually consists of stored up data of the past and its interpretations. Of course the interpretations are very individualistic depending on his/her conditioning, so there is no ultimate truth in there.

All perspectives towards the end are just one of the many perspectives possible for a given situation – no perspective is ultimately accurate or truthful. You can identify with these pointers on why the mind is always confused

  • When you live by your mind you live in the world of perceptions, all perceptions are ultimately faulty projections
  • The future can never be known on the basis of the past, it can be predicted but no prediction is ever going to define reality
  • Life is ultimately uncertain, the mind always seeks certainty and hence the conflict and confusion
  • There is no such thing as the right decision, it’s just one direction that your life heads in (may be as per your destiny). All directions ultimately merge into a path of learning. The mind in its naivety believes in the concept of “right” decision.

So you can see that if you live by the mind you are forever bound to confusion, no matter how many self-improvements seminars you attend!

Wisdom Clears Confusion

The only liberation from confusion is to get “wise” or in other words just become mature in your outlook. Understand that life is forever beckoning you to stay open and willing, or else you will suffer (and stay confused) terribly as the flux of life twists and turns into new directions.

Here are Some Simple Pointers to Stay Free of Confusion:

1.) Stay in “Not Knowing” – Get comfortable with “not knowing”. The wisest person on earth ultimately understood that all knowing is still worthless compared to “not knowing”.

Live the mystery – Life will always be a mystery, just embrace it.

2.) Wanting Creates Confusion – Stop the neurotic need to want more all the time. Nothing you get will ever satisfy you for long. The need for more “knowledge” is ultimately inane, because it won’t be long before you are confused again.

3.) “Future Living” is Madness – Live for the moment. There is a simplicity in just acknowledging the present moment and staying in it instead of wanting to get to the future all the time.

4.) There is No Failure – In life there is no such thing called “failure”. Everything is just pure experience, only the neurotic conditioned mind labels an experience as failure or success. In fact there is a seed of growth and learning in every experience we encounter that helps us grow and become more wise.

5.) You Don’t Know What’s Good for You – The mind will never accept this truth, but deep down in your heart you know that it’s true. Do you really know what’s good for you? Can you ever be sure? Be guided by life, “all is well” always.

6.) Stay Free of the Mind – if not always, at least for a few hours everyday. Don’t give in to its demands and “horror” stories all the time. You will be surprised to find that you can easily be independent of your mind. You are the awareness in which the mind operates, not the other way around.

Live like a free being instead of being cluttered by the mindful activities of always wanting to “decide” and “predict”. All your confusion ultimately will amount to nothing because life will take its course in the end.












6 comments

  • Madhvi says:

    Confusion starts with multiple ‘can do’ thoughts. So work on your thought process. Be a watchman of your thoughts.

  • Pali says:

    one person very jealous of my success always comments on my clothes, possessions, looks etc. and when I try to counter him trying to prove something (true) he will keep on giving wrong arguments and the debate gets dirtier. I thought a lot about it and then I decided to not to talk to him at all. I think that is working cause he wants that I talk to him and he can debate with me but that is not happening and I like to see that restlessness on his face now. So sometimes inaction can do what an action can’t.

  • AGJ says:

    These days I am very confused. Thank you for the knowledge and I will try to be in clam and cool.

  • RD says:

    @JBrown, probably what you meant was you were just not able to achieve as much as you should have achieved given that you were at the right place. I have exactly the same problem. I am stuck, hasty decisions , repenting things later (even the age matches :) ).

    Do you really think that it’s too late to fix things? By the way I even have to support a family of few people on my own. But I believe this can be fixed. It’s never too late.

  • JBrown says:

    I am always confused. I can never accomplish anything. Come to think of it i have been suffering my whole life with this. I have made hasty decisions and have found myself in a bad place professionally, emotionally, financially, and mentally. I am 30 and I envy everybody who are unlike myself. I think I have a big issue here and I don’t think meds will help. They make me feel worse.

  • Leon Parker says:

    Very insightful. I suffer from extreme paranoia and have a very hard time making decisions. Can you tell me what I can do to make confident decisions? In any given situation, I always see some kind of negative in all possible solutions and never know how to proceed further. Thank you!