Are you constantly putting other people’s needs before yours?
If so, you are doing a grave injustice not only to yourself but also to others.
Life is all about balance and when you constantly put others before you, you become imbalanced and that is bound to lead to deep unhappiness in the long run.
Therefore, take time to become conscious of this imbalance in your life. And bring your life into balance by learning to put yourself first.
Start with some self reflection. Spend time with yourself, listen to yourself, understand yourself, find out what truly makes you happy and what makes you sad, what lifts your vibration and what makes you feel drained, what motivates you and what depresses you, what your true passions are and where you want to go in life.
Once you identify these, make it a point to respect what you believe in, your needs, dreams and desires and start giving them your utmost priority.
The following quotes will inspire you to prioritize yourself and give yourself the value you deserve.
“You always have to remember to take care of you first and foremost, because when you stop taking care of yourself, you get out of balance and you really forget how to take care of others.”
– Jada Pinkett
“How you treat yourself is how you treat God, because you are the representative of God in your life. So when you put yourself last, you are putting God last.”
– Iyanla Vanzant
“It’s not selfish, but selfless to be first, to be as good as possible to you, to take care of you, to keep you whole and healthy, that doesn’t mean that you disregard everything and everyone, but you gotta keep your cup full.”
– Iyanla Vanzant
“If you want to have enough to give to others, you will need to take care of yourself first. A tree that refuses water and sunlight for itself can’t bear fruit for others.”
– Emily Maroutian
“Self-care is not selfish. You cannot serve from an empty vessel.”
– Eleanor Brown
looking after yourself is the greatest act of kindness you can give the world. Loving yourself first is the best way to spread love.”
― Holly Bourne
“When you start sacrificing yourself for other people, you make them a thief, because they are stealing from you what you need and they don’t even know it.”
– Iyanla Vanzant
“Know what matters most to you and be unwilling to compromise those priorities at almost any price.”
– Frank Sonnenberg
“Be who you are and say what you feel because those mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”
– Bernard Brauch
“Find yourself first, like yourself first, love yourself FIRST, & friendship & love will naturally find YOU.”
– Mandy Hale
“Whenever you feel compelled to put others first at the expense of yourself, you are denying your own reality, your own identity.”
– David Stafford
“Until you value yourself, you won’t value your time. Until you value your time, you will not do anything with it.”
– M. Scott Peck
“Always putting others first creates deep resentment, destroys your happiness, and is unsustainable.
– Aziz Gazipura
Putting yourself first allows you to meet your needs in the most skillful way. This, in turn, increases your happiness, joy, and capacity to love, so you can give freely and create healthy relationships.”
“If you don’t workout, sleep, meditate, relax, or do whatever special things you need to do for you, you won’t be the best version of yourself. When you’re not your best version of yourself, you can’t do things for others. In a way, it’s actually selfless to take great care of yourself because it allows you to be more present for your family and friends.”
– Heather Monahan
“You have to be self-interested in order to be selfless. You have to put yourself first if you want to be of use to other people.”
– Rachel Bartholomew
“Always choose yourself first. Women are very socialized to choose other people. If you put yourself first, it’s this incredible path you can forge for yourself.”
– Rebecca Traister
“If you don’t make the choices in your own life, then someone else is going to end up making them for you and they are not gonna be good.
– James Altucher.
“Choose to put yourself first and make you a priority. It’s not selfish, it’s necessary.”
– Keysha Jade
“To gain self-respect, you need to put yourself first.”
– Lorii Myers
“If you don’t value yourself, you’re not going to draw valuable things into your life.”
– Robert Tew
“You don’t need to live to fulfill other’s expectations. Live for yourself, love yourself and do not let them tell you that it is selfish.”
– Mridula Singh
“Don’t wait for a crisis to realize what matters most. Put yourself first right now. Because right now is all we have.”
– Brittany Burgunder
“If you have the ability to love, love yourself first.”
– Charles Bukowski
“Remember to delight yourself first, then others can be truly delighted.”
“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. Your really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.”
– Lucille Ball
“Value yourself first and only then you can learn to value others.“
– Charlyn Khater
“You have to validate yourself first, and then you will receive the much-deserved healing validation from the rest of the world.”
– A.D. Posey
“When you care for yourself first, the world will also find you worthy of care.”
― Haemin Sunim
“You don’t have to stop looking after yourself just to help the world. In fact, sometimes it’s better for the world if you put yourself first. That’s not being selfish, in fact looking after yourself is the greatest act of kindness you can give the world. Loving yourself first is the best way to spread love.”
– Holly Bourne
“There is a reason flight attendants tell you to put your mask on first in an emergency…you cannot be important to anyone else if you are not first and foremost important to yourself. Appreciate and love yourself then use that to do the same for others. ”
– Shelley K Wall
“People pleasing and putting others first literally diminished my mental, emotional, spiritual and physical well-being. Overwhelmingly, most emotionally wounded people demonstrate this trait. Many of us have been programmed to put others first; to be of service to others before we serve ourselves.”
― Christopher Dines
“Addicts, in a very general but foundational sense, are constitutionally unable to put themselves first. They have spent their lives avoiding putting themselves first, hiding themselves and their problems behind habitual and destructive behaviors.”
– Morteza Khaleghi
“If you prioritize yourself, you are going to save yourself.”
– Gabrielle Union
“If you are really humble you will put yourself first when you need to take care of you.”
– Bryant McGill
“Prove to the world you ARE worth something by treating yourself with the utmost respect and hope that other people will follow your example. And even if they don’t, at least one person in the world is treating you well: YOU.”
― Carrie Hope Fletcher
“You should endeavor to give your body what it needs to be healthy, your mind what it needs to be peaceful and focused, and your soul what it needs to feel content.”
– Dedeker Winston
5 steps to putting yourself first
The following are 5 simple steps that will help you put yourself first.
1. Understand yourself
You cannot put yourself first if you don’t know what you are truly about. So take your time to get in touch with yourself. Spend some time alone and listen to yourself.
Find out what makes you happy. The things you are passionate about. Find out what lifts your spirit and what drains your energy. Find out the things that motivate you and those that depress you.
The more you know and understand yourself, the better you are in a position to put yourself first.
2. Love and accept yourself
Unless you love, accept and value yourself, you will not be able to put yourself first.
Understanding yourself as discussed above is the gateway to self love and acceptance. Go a little deeper and become conscious of all the negative and limiting beliefs that are running in your mind. Let these negative beliefs go and replace them with positive, empowering beliefs.
Simply stay conscious of your thoughts and self talk. The moment you catch yourself thinking a limiting talk, figure out where this thought is coming from. What negative beliefs that you hold about yourself that is creating this thought. Once you become conscious of your thoughts and beliefs this way, you begin to free yourself of them.
3. Self validate yourself
When you are constantly looking for external validation, you give your power away to others. And when that happens, it is impossible for you to put yourself first.
Realize that you are enough as you are, you do not need anyone to validate your existence. The only validation you need is from your own self.
4. Believe in yourself
As long as you doubt yourself, feel that you are not good enough, feel that you don’t deserve the good things in life, you will always put yourself second to last. To develop self belief, you first need to become conscious of and discard all the self defeating and limiting beliefs in your mind.
Stay conscious of negative self talk and replace it with positive talk. For instance, if you catch yourself saying, ‘I cannot do this’, rephrase it to, ‘I am fully capable of achieving this’.
Also, realize that perfectionism is an illusion. No one is perfect, we all make mistakes and that is perfectly fine. Strive for excellence, but do not strive for perfection.
5. Prioritize yourself
The final step of-course is to start giving priority to your priorities. Start placing utmost value on your time and energy.
Do not waste your time or energy toward tasks that are not in alignment with your true nature. Learn to say no and realize that ‘No’ is a complete sentence in itself. You need not justify your no, with any reasons.
By putting yourself first, you ensure that your cup is always full so you have enough to help others.
Also Read: 101 Inspiring Quotes On Being Yourself